ARE YOU STILL CHOKING THE BIRD?

BY JACK GRAY

On the wall of a medical lab where patients were regularly monitored for blood work there was an intriguing hand drawn sketch. It had been carefully colored with crayons. It was of a bullfrog being swallowed alive by a very large bird, and the label at the top admonished “Don’t EVER Give Up”. At first it looked like a pretty hopeless situation, until you noticed that every though his head was gone, the hands of the frog were still wrapped firmly around the neck of the bird. So we had a stalemate…but only so long as the frog kept his death grip in choking the bird. Therefore the message, Don’t EVER Give Up!

After I had commented on the sketch, the nurse in charge graciously offered to make me a copy. Another nurse even remarked, “Some days I feel like the frog and some days I feel like that bird”. It gave me a surprising lift just to affirm again that I was still holding on. It was my affirmation that things were going to get better.

For those of us who run, there are many things that threaten to swallow us alive. These usher in our greatest enemy of discouragement. Perhaps nothing saps more of our energy or has a more negative effect on our running. Just consider:

1.   IT MAY BE THE LOSS OF A JOB WE REALLY LIKED. Then the question comes: “Why did they do this to me?” “Didn’t they appreciate how hard I was working for them?” “Will I be able to find anything else that I like as much?” The questions go on; and it can be a very difficult time in life for any of us.

2.   IT MAY BE A PAINFUL DIVORCE, where people can do such hurtful things to those they once professed to love. This can be compounded by lawyers who have learned that it is in their interest not to settle for as long as possible; or by a judge who has such awesome power, who with no more than a flick of a pen can make hasty judgments that can change the lives of those involved for years to come. Or it may not be a divorce; but only the loss of a friendship, or the ending of a relationship and the feeling of being betrayed by someone that you would have trusted with your very life. Those who are going through these things wonder if the pain will ever end.

3.   OR IT MAY BE A NAGGING INJURY THAT WILL NOT GO AWAY. They come at the most unexpected times. Right when we thought we were doing everything right. We were being careful; or perhaps running the best we had in years. Then the blow comes; and the uncertainty is worse than the injury. We wonder if we can run again; and if so, how long will it take to get back to where we were? We have the feeling of being in the mouth of the bird; and we are trying to hang on for dear life.

Then your problem may not be any of these; but you know of something else that is trying to swallow you up; and you are wondering how you are going to survive. Maybe you have even despaired of being able to hold on much longer. Do you realize, however, that the rules are not that hard? The problem is application; and I struggle with that part just as you do. But we can still work our way through the worst of times. In some ways we are more fortunate than most for the other aspects of our running have made our solutions easier. Here is a way to begin:

1.   KEEP RUNNING. As far as possible leave your problems on the trail. Anger, flustrations and resentment can fly away as you run. The amazing thing is that sometimes this will even make you faster. You can simply work out the tensions of life (and sometimes find new answers) as you do what you already love to do. And being with good friends DOES help.

2.   BE KIND TO YOURSELF. Realize that every bad thing that happens is not your fault. Bad things still happen to good people. So give yourself a break. These things don’t mean that you had to do a thing wrong. Your still the same person that you were before and beating up on yourself is not going to help

3.   TIME IS A GREAT HEALER, so strive for patience as you wait. Avoid making hasty decisions when you are in pain. Realize the great victory in even small steps of progress.

Come to recognize that problems that look like mountains when you stand too close can gain a better perception when you look back on them later. So your immediate problem may not be all that important. The really important thing is to keep choking the bird. Don’t EVER Give Up!